XXVIII. Arrange short dialogues according to the model. Use the

247
The American, speaking in German, asked Remarque why
he had never visited the United States. His answer was: “I know
only a few sentences in English.”
“What are the sentences?” inquired the girl.
Remarque said: “How do you do? I love you. Forgive me.
Forget me. Ham and eggs, please.”
“Why, with that vocabulary you could tour my country from
Maine to California,” the girl said.
XXX. Find a picture on the topic “Rest” for your discussion in class.
Write 8—10 questions which would help your fellow
students to describe
the picture.
XXXI. a) Translate into Russian. b) Find the key
phrases. Retell the
text. Mind the speed limit:
Let’s Have a Picnic
Picnics are popular with women and children and some men
who know how to make a fire. Children are fond of picnics chief

ly because, as a rule, there are no tables at picnics and conse

quently no table manners and because they have an excellent
opportunity to eat things that do not agree with them. Since pic

nic lunches are always just about the same and therefore require
little imagination, women do not have to trouble about thinking
up a meal.
Much depends, of course, upon the day. Typical picnic
weather is of three kinds. Either it is dark and threatening with
occasional showers in the morning, clearing in the afternoon or
it is hot and clear in the morning, with thunder showers in the
afternoon; or there is a steady drizzle all day long. But as most of
the lunch is prepared ahead of time, nothing much can be done
about it. After all, there is not much choice between eating a
picnic lunch that has waited a day or two and getting a soaking.
Picnic grounds are usually situated on a body of water at some
high altitude. One of these features is essential, for no picnic can
be a success unless the children have something to fall into, or
fall off. Also, a body of water naturally suggests taking fishing
tackles along. No fish was ever known to have been caught on a
picnic, but fishing serves as an excellent excuse for getting out
of the way while the heavy work is being done.

248
Quite the most important feature of the picnic is the lunch.
Fried chicken is always popular ... Then there should be hard

boiled eggs. Almost everything else that comes in a can or a
paper bag is good for a picnic lunch. These containers are very
important as, after the contents have been eaten, they are
strewn about and identify the picnic ground. Ginger ale, too,
should be brought along to remind you that you left the bottle

opener at home. However, there is always at least one person
present who knows how to open a bottle on a rock.
As soon as the food and other equipment have been un

packed it is in order to start a fire. Collecting wood provides oc

cupation for people who do not know how to amuse themselves.
After the lunch has been eaten a picnic is mostly anticli

max. But there is always the possibility of someone nearly get

ting drowned or running into a hornets’ nest or twisting an an

kle. However, you must remain until well into afternoon, or
you may not appear to have had a good time. To make matters
worse, someone will suggest singing.
Picnics, whatever may be said against them, have their ad

vantages. At least they reawaken in the hearts of many the
truth of the old saying that there is no place like home.
(S. M. G. From “Humour Variety. Stories,
Jokes, Cartoons”, No. 2, London)

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